Be Unapologetically Yourself Mama

girl resting head on hand at bench in black sweatshirt

Part 1.

There have been times in my life that I want to be small. I want to hide away and be invisible. I want to go unnoticed.

As women, we often apologize if we can’t make an event, have a differing opinion, or happen to inconvenience someone. We want others to be comfortable at the risk of loosing ourselves. 

It’s an awful way of living and sounds horrible when said out loud. But so many of us live here.

I really started reflecting on this area of my life after having my first daughter. I want her to grow up strong. I want her to have an opinion. I want her to stand up for herself. I want her to love who she is and live unapologetically.

When we try to shrink ourselves, what message are we sending our children?

We are their first and most influential example. It is important we demonstrate self worth in our everyday lives. You need to be unapologetically yourself, Mama.

What does it mean to take up space?

It is making room and giving yourself permission to be the authentic version of you.  It is allowing yourself to have an opinion, to feel emotions and to create and hold boundaries.

Taking up space is demonstrating your self worth by letting others know you are of value. It is showing your children you care enough about yourself to voice your opinion and ask for what you need. It is respecting yourself enough to let go of what no longer serves you in your life. 

How can I practice taking up space?

This may feel very scary especially if you have not practiced this in a while. Start with what feels comfortable to you in your situation. 

  1. Create a Mantra: I have a mantra that I read every morning. I put it together one day after searching positive affirmations on Pinterest and copied the ones I liked the best. You can write your own or adopt mine. 

Today, I will say yes to myself. I am creating a life that I love. I have the power to change myself and to let go of what is not in my control. I choose calm over anxiety and I value myself enough to maintain healthy boundaries. I will attract positivity and opportunity. I am worthy of success and I am grateful for the blessings in my life.

Read your mantra every day and whenever you need a good reminder that you are worth it.

2. Erase the words “sorry” or “just” from your vocabulary: unless you truly are apologizing for something. I apologize for so many random things and now my 4 year old daughter is saying sorry for things that inconvenience others. It breaks my heart to hear her take on guilt and responsibility, when the situation does not call for it. I am doing my best to change this mindset in myself before it becomes a habit for her as well.

3. Ask for help: Be specific and ask for exactly what you need. If you are a new mom and people are wanting to help out, don’t be afraid to say,  “I need you to come over for 1 hour and wash my dishes and fold a load of laundry.” Or maybe your kids are older and it may look like, “I need you to watch the kids while I go for a 30 minute run, then shower and blow dry my hair.” People who love you genuinely want to help and will appreciate your guidance in a way that they can be of service.

4. Say, “Thank you”: When someone gives you a compliment, own it. Do not down play other peoples positive opinions of you. You are deserving of recognition. You are deserving of joy. You are deserving of love. You are deserving of praise. You are deserving of admiration. Let your children see how you handle compliments with appreciation and grace so that they too can receive good things. 

There are so many more ways to take up space. Let’s start here and put these 4 steps into practice. You can do it!

We are rooting for you.

Living Her Legacy,

-Jill G Sutton

Want more ways to focus on personal development?

Check out these two posts: 3 Things I’m Good At or Verbalize Your Moonshot

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